- I am a Christian and everything I offer will be from that perspective.
- In light of #1, same-sex unions are deviant and fall far outside of my discussion.
- I believe that since the institution of marriage was designed by God, anything that falls outside this original design can succeed, but shouldn't be expected to.
- Even the best of Christian marriages consist of two sinners, both possessing the ability to lie to and deceive the other. There is always a chance of failure, even when everything is done right from the beginning. The idea is to make your chance of failure so minimal that it would be more likely that you'll be struck by lightning or sucked into a vortex and deposited on Mars.
Marriage is a good thing. After all, it was created by God, and everything He made is good. He said so, after all, and God is the only being for whom a self-compliment is not a vain and selfish thing. It is mankind that mucked things up, and he didn't wait long to start doing that either.
Just because marriage--the art of getting along with one person exclusively for a majority of your days here on earth--is a difficult process, doesn't mean that it should be a process to be avoided. It is, as ministers of old have said, "an honorable estate." It is designed as a remedy to loneliness, a way to respectfully perpetuate the species, and the only legitimate outlet for one of the strongest drives a man can experience (more in Part III). It gives you someone to keep you warm at night, a partner in the Struggle of Life, a best friend, a confidante, a teammate. It gives you the opportunity to create something that is a part of the both of you, and have this thing endure and become a person that would never have existed had you not loved one another and both loved that child. These are some really cool fringe benefits.
Of course, some will only see the negative aspects of being married. I choose not to address any negative aspects of being married because I don't think there are any. There are negative aspects to living. Remember: we mucked things up in the beginning and we've continued to do so. Any negative aspects that a person attributes to marriage are really just negative aspects that reflect on the individual, not marriage itself.
Self-interest is what motivated that first couple, in the midst of their marital bliss, to screw it up for the rest of us. We've continued the family tradition of selfishness, from generation to generation, with even the best of people passing on a degree of it down the line. Some capitalize on it a good deal heavier than others, but it's always there. Knowing this would happen, the Creator designed two relationships that would force us to act unselfishly toward others, at least on a limited scale, or utterly fail at human relations. One is marriage. The second is parenthood.
So, marriage is good. It's good for you, and when you are committed to making it work properly, it's good for mankind. It's better than recycling, saving the rain forests or baby seals, and it's a lot better for the planet than limiting your carbon footprint. The destruction of mankind will have nothing to do with carbon and everything to do with the curse of selfishness.
So, I ask you: are you up to the challenge of saving the planet?
Stay tuned for Part II: Not Screwing Up the Most Important Decision of Your Life
This gave me lots of good things to think about. I like your presentation style.
ReplyDelete@auralay_ariemay - Much thanks, for the compliments and the rec. I'm hoping you find the other parts useful in some way as well. Nice to meet new xanga friends, too.
ReplyDeleteHonest truth is that I have been away from Xanga a bit the last few weeks, but I knew you were posting these. I just have been drumming up the will to deal with the issue due attention. A few months ago I got out of a relationship that I thought was going to end in marriage. I have to say it has been very difficult. I thought I was over it relatively quickly, but even today I was realizing I'm not over it, not fully. She was my first girlfriend, and since I am 28, I thought that it was time now, and God was providing for marriage; I am not much of one for casual dating. I respect marriage even more, having been through that prayerful attempt; I think I realize better now how serious it is, and holy.It's interesting that you took the approach of discussing how good marriage is for society. Just earlier this evening I was arguing with agnophilo on a similar topic. The girl who wrote the post (here) felt judged by Christians who say she shouldn't have premarital sex. I didn't think it was worthwhile to try to argue with her, so I just said that I think people make the sex issue more important than God, by which I meant that it's wrong for people to extend condemnation to her in her sin, but also that she's wrong to make her right to sex more important than God makes it. Meanwhile agnophilo made some comment implying that people who don't believe in sex outside of marriage are morons from the bronze age. I took issue with his idea of progress, because I think post-modern ideas of self and love are destroying society. The ensuing conversation is there for the reading. I think it's important for people to realize what a massive breakdown is happening due to self-over-others attitudes, particularly in marriages.Thanks for sharing this angle. I am not up to saving the planet, but I know someone who is.
ReplyDelete@elgaberino - The demise of marriage and purity in our society is just a symptom of a greater problem, which is a general lostness. "...wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."That seems pretty clear, doesn't it? I read part of that post you referenced and was tempted to respond with a quote from 1 John 3, especially the part that says: "This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children ofthe devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child ofGod; nor is anyone who does not love his brother." I felt it might be the casting of pearls thing though. This person is apparently secure in their delusion, content to dwell in the land of Nod.
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